Candidate: May I come in Sir?
Interviewer: Yes. Please Mr.….?
Candidate: Bhave. Adbhut Bhave.
Interviewer: Yes Mr. Bhave. Please take a seat. I am Sanjeev Pinto.
Interviewer: So, Mr. Bhave, as I understand you are here for the interview.
Candidate: That is correct Sir.
Interviewer: Well guess what? I am here for the interview too!
Candidate: (delayed forced laughter)
Interviewer: (acknowledging) I see you are wearing an orange T-shirt to an interview. Do you think it is appropriate?
Candidate: Sir the red one was wet.
Interviewer: I see. (hint of surprise) Before we proceed I’d like to inform you that I’ll be taking your technical, personal and HR interview.
Candidate: Right Sir.
Interviewer: To begin with, tell me something about yourself Adbhut.
Candidate: Yes Sir. I am 20 years old. I am currently doing my 3rd year in Chemical Engineering from VIT, Pune. Pune is my hometown. I love Pune. I like watching movies, listening to music and studying….
Interviewer: You like to study? (going through the mark sheets)
Candidate: Yes Sir.
Interviewer: Oh…I see. Please continue.
Candidate: I like traveling; I like cycling, playing tabla, watching movies…music……movies.
Interviewer: That’s good. I guess you watch a lot of movies.
Candidate: I do Sir!
Interviewer: So, what is your favourite subject?
Interviewer: I was asking about studies.
Candidate: Oh! Yes. I like Math, Chemistry. I love Fluid Dynamics a lot.
Interviewer: I see. Haven’t you flunked in all of them?
Candidate: Not all Sir! Fluid Mechanics is still in revaluation.
Interviewer: Why do you love FM so much?
Candidate: I love fluids Sir. A lot. Tea, coffee, water, Coke, beer….
Interviewer: I see. Since you like the subject so much, would you mind if I ask you a couple of questions on the it?
Candidate: No Sir. Not at all.
Interviewer: What is ‘The Bernoulli Principle’?
Candidate: Sir the Bernoulli Principle states that if the lead actor in a movie is above fifty-five years of age, the lead actress should be less than half of that for the film to succeed at the box office.
Candidate: The Bernoulli Principle Sir. Christoph Bernoulli. The famous German screenwriter.
Interviewer: My question was related to Chemical Engineering Mr. Bhave.
Candidate: Oh! That one….it has something to do with water, two drums and a pipe, Sir.
Interviewer: You don’t know The Bernoulli Principle?
Candidate: I do know it Sir. Just not well enough to put it in words.
Interviewer: What is the unit of viscosity?
Candidate: I definitely don’t know that one Sir.
Interviewer: I see (scribbling on paper) What was the other subject you liked? Chemistry was it?
Candidate: Yes Sir. I like it a lot.
Interviewer: What is the fifth element?
Candidate: The Fifth Element is a sci-fi romantic thriller starring Bruce Willis and Milla Jovovich in the lead roles. Although the movie was a top grosser it was highly criticized. The Bernoulli Principle is not applicable to this film Sir. Bruce Willis was underage.
Interviewer: I was talking about the periodic table Mr. Bhave.
Candidate: Oh! Hydrogen, Helium, Oxygen, Nitrogen, Sodium…..Sodium Sir!
Interviewer: I see. Which are the heavy metals?
Candidate: Black Sabbath and Metallica. Period.
Interviewer: I see (scribbling away) Now, we’ll proceed with the PI and HR Interview.
Candidate: Ok Sir.
Interviewer: What are your expectations from InfySOS?
Candidate: Well….I believe that my job with InfySOS should be a welcome experience. I really want to work for a company as great as yours.
Interviewer: Wow that is a good answer. What according to you is your greatest strength?
Candidate: I can down three pints of beer in less than two minutes.
Interviewer: What? No…I mean work wise.
Candidate: Oh!..Sorry Sir! My greatest strength would be C programming.
Interviewer: Well that is good. I see you have certificates to prove it (going through them)
Candidate: Yes Sir.
Interviewer: Now, consider this situation- Your friend is in love with a girl who lets say is rather promiscuous. And he intends to marry her. What will you do? Will you make your friend realize her flaws?
Candidate: Mmmm…..Sir is the lady in question very pretty?
Interviewer: What !?..Why?
Candidate: No Sir….If she is not that hot-I mean pretty, then I can show him an even hotter-I mean prettier girl, and make him fall in love with her.
Interviewer: Yes she is hot-I mean pretty.
Candidate: Then Mmmm….Sir, is she related to any of our other friends?
Candidate: Then the situation would be really complicated, Sir.
Candidate: In that case I’ll directly go to her and ask her to back off.
Interviewer: Ok. That’s mighty thoughtful of you. Well…..that I think concludes the interview. Do you have any questions for me? (scribbling)
Candidate: Yes Sir. I do. In the company’s name of InfySOS, SOS stands for ‘Save Our Souls’ right? The other guys were kinda arguing about it.
Interviewer: (stops scribbling) No Mr. Bhave. It stands for Software Outsourcing Solutions.
Candidate: Oh Ok. I did feel one of the S’s stood for software.
Interviewer: Well…..It was nice meeting you Mr. Bhave. (shaking hands) The results will be out in an hour.
Candidate: Sir, if I may ask, what are the chances of me getting this job?
Interviewer: I would say the chances are good Mr. Bhave.
Interviewer: Nah….Just Kidding…..Please close the door behind you.
(A follow-up to Part I)